I decided I didn't want to skip this meme, so I just changed a few of the questions to be more relevant to my life. Hasta la vista, 2011!
1. What did you do in 2011 that you’d never done before?
Was hospitalized for a reason other than to give birth (to stop pre-term labor, thankfully with success). Gave birth to twins. Came home from the hospital and left babies in the NICU (definitely the worst part of my year). Nursed two babies. Brought home and cared for two babies. In general, the newness in this year was related to the Two Babies.
2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My new year's resolution was to survive 2011. It was close, but I squeaked by.
In 2012 I want to feed my family more vegetables, give my big kids more attention and affection, and try to be gentler with myself. We'll see how it goes.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
Not anyone geographically close, but it was an Internet baby BOOM. In particular I was anticipating the births of A'Dell's Charlotte, Diane's Leo, Maggie's Emma, and Maureen's Ann Marie, but I could name another half-dozen Internet cuties as well. I have a lot of Twitter friends with new babies, and sharing the experiences (especially in #midnightfeedingclub) was a big part of keeping me sane this year.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Thankfully, no.
5. What countries did you visit? What states did you visit? What counties did you visit?
Well, what with going to our hometown (which is ninety long miles away) two entire times, plus making a trek all the way from the southern part of our state to the northern part of our state (with babies in tow)... I bet I was in eight or ten different counties this year. Wow! That is almost a dozen whole counties.
You can call me intrepid. I won't argue.
6. What would you like to have in 2012 that you lacked in 2011?
Peace.
I have wound myself so tightly trying to manage my life that I am not so much living as I am ricocheting from task to task with no time to enjoy or even to notice the good things I have. That needs to change. This year, I hope it will.
7. What dates from 2011 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 5: My friends on Twitter were talking about Cinco de Mayo margaritas and I was sitting in a hospital bed watching contractions peak on a monitor and listening to a neonatologist talk about NICU time. It was the day I let go of my plan/hope of having full-term babies and bringing them home right away.
May 12: In the first hour of this day Linus Michael and Ambrose John came (practically) flying out of me and our life was (for the third and fourth times) changed forever.
May 13: I was discharged from the hospital and left my babies there. I cried a LOT this day.
May 27: We brought Linus home from the NICU without Ambrose. More crying. (Sense a theme?)
May 29: Finally, both of them home! A joyous day.
December 25: Christmas at home with our little family. The year was almost over and I think this was the first time I realized and affirmed that we will live through this.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
I kicked butt this year. I gave birth to TWO babies! I exclusively breastfed them (I'd been lucky to have had easy nursing experiences before, but this time I worked HARD to feed my babies.) I managed to be a primary, stay-at-home caregiver to four children under the age of five for many months.
I was more exhausted, more strung out, more despairing at the hugeness of this job than I've ever been, and I still pushed through.
2011 was the year when I realized that that "cannot" is really - no, really, as cheesy as it sounds - NOT in my vocabulary.
9. What was your biggest failure?
I'm tempted to name a bunch of little things, but they are so tiny in comparison to the success of this year that I'm refusing myself permission to list them.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I might've had a mild case of preeclampsia the week before the babies were born; the doctors could never agree. I had mastitis in mid-summer which fortunately passed quickly, but I was miserable for a few days. I suffered a couple killer headaches and a bunch of minor ones that I'm pretty sure would stop if I could manage to get enough sleep and stay hydrated. Bah! But otherwise, a pretty healthy year.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
Camelbak hydration pack, which got me through bed rest and which I still keep in bed with me at night so I can drink water without even sitting up. That thing rocks.
Also the iPhone 4s. It's my first smartphone and I'm hooked.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Bryan's. I always chuckle inwardly when people ask me if he "helps" with the children. If you know him, you know what a ridiculous question that is. He matches me stride for stride and I'm continually amazed by his willingness to sacrifice his needs for mine and the kids'.
song sound will always remind you of 2011?
It's an unbeatable combination, really: shrieking + cackling + wailing + gulping/swallowing.
The shrieking is Camilla, upset because Blaise is beating up on her. The laughter is his, obviously. One baby is wailing because I am not holding him. The other is gulping/swallowing because he is nursing, which is the reason I can't get up from the couch to solve the shrieking/cackling/wailing.
It is SAD how many times this exact scenario happened to me this year.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
– happier or sadder? This is complicated.
On one hand, I am worn thinner than I've ever been, and am exhausted and overwhelmed a lot of the time. I cry often.
On the other hand, I am relieved, both that my twin pregnancy had a happy ending and that we made it through the first eight months with two babies. And also, we HAVE those babies, and Linus and Ambrose are a joy and a gift in themselves.
On balance, I'm going with happier, but I hope that this time next year I am happier AND rejuvenated AND more content.
– thinner or fatter? Thinner. But this time last year I was in the second trimester of a pregnancy during which I was specifically trying to gain weight. So that's not saying much.
– richer or poorer? Poorer. Did you read the part about the medical bills? And we've just decided to send Camilla to private school next fall, so watch this space for the same answer next year.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Being gentle and patient with my husband. Listening to my big kids and enjoying them. Giving myself credit.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Blaming myself and viewing every weakness as a failure.
20. How did you spend Christmas?
At home, just the six of us, on Christmas Eve and Christmas morning. 4:30pm Christmas Eve Mass, appetizers for dinner, reading The Grinch, A Visit from St. Nicholas, and the account of the nativity from the Gospel of Luke, hanging stockings. Opening stockings with the big kids at 8:00am before the babies were up, eating cinnamon rolls and bacon for breakfast, opening family presents one by one around the tree.
Later in the day my family came for a big dinner, and we continued our Christmas celebrations over the following days, but the evening of the 24th and the morning of the 25th were perfect.
21. Did you fall in love in 2011?
With my baby boys, of course.
22. What was your favorite TV program?
As is my tradition when a baby is born, I re-watched all of Gilmore girls. I still love it.
23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
I don't hate anyone.
24. What was the best book you read?
My best reading experience this year was re-reading Harry Potter, the whole series from start to finish, in November and December. That is one incredible story.
25. What was your greatest musical discovery? Did you, by any chance, perfect your recipe for blueberry muffins this year? Would you like to share it with the world?
As a matter of fact, I did and I would.
26. What did you want and get?
Two healthy babies, praise God.
27. What did you want and not get?
A full-term birth for my babies. A reasonable amount of rest, of both the emotional and physical types.
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